


Dissolution

by Are_you_ever_not_going_to_fall_for_that



Series: The Arrangement [8]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Emotions, Feels, M/M, Messy, Part of the Arrangement Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-24
Updated: 2015-05-24
Packaged: 2018-03-31 22:36:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3995635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Are_you_ever_not_going_to_fall_for_that/pseuds/Are_you_ever_not_going_to_fall_for_that
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony finally makes a decision.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dissolution

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry I left you hanging this is the earliest I could upload this been a bit busy lately.

Tony was enjoying another scotch trying to calm his nerves for what he knew what coming. A glance at the clock confirmed that Loki was late again. The raven haired being often had been late, but it hadn't really mattered because Tony had never known until till after Loki had come.  He never had to actually know that Loki was late before now.   
  
He messed around with the vial, resisting the temptation to take it before Loki got here, knowing that he could start again and be oblivious. Once he told Loki, the period of obliviousness would be over.

 

Loki popped up after Tony had taken another drink of his scotch. Tony knew that Loki must have put the potion in his drink because he never appeared before giving Tony his memories back, not anymore.

 

Tony lifted the vial up and saw Loki’s eyes narrow slightly at the sight of it. “I didn’t take it.”

 

Loki blinked and stared at him like he was waiting for the other shoe to drop. Tony took a deep breath. He wasn’t exactly sure what to say; the last and really only time he had expressed any sort of feelings was to Pepper… and that hadn’t exactly turned out well. This was messier and more complicated than anything he had been in before, and considering his past as a playboy, that was saying quite a lot.   
  
But however messy and complicated this was, Tony knew that he had to say what he needed to say. That didn’t make it any easier though. He had thought about this non-stop ever since he had been given the vial. Why was it so difficult to say now?  
  


“I…” Tony, for a moment, felt like there was no air in his lungs; he hadn’t felt like this since he had been in outer space. Bad comparison.   
  
“This thing between us, whatever it is, is messed up,” Tony said because he doubted that either one of them wasn’t aware of that. After all, normally in a relationship or even a friends with benefits kind of situation, both of the parties generally knew that there was at least  screwing even when they weren't together. For the last two months neither of them had known about whatever it was they had.

 

“In fact, it’s so messed up I don’t even-” Tony cut himself off because he had been starting down a tangent and what he needed to say was going to be hard enough as it was.   
  
“Anyways,” he spoke, bringing him back to his point- only to stop as he wasn’t sure how to say it. No matter how many times he had gone over it in his head, it wasn’t coming out like he had hoped. Tony usually wasn’t this nervous. He was a billionaire and a superhero; very little made him nervous, but this did.   
  
“I was wrong,” He managed to get out. The brunette had hoped that once he got talking it would be easy, but it was only slightly easier after that. Tony shook his head “No matter what you’ve done, I can’t treat you like this. I can’t have it both ways. I can’t be with you one day and then forget you the next, just because it’s easy.“ Tony said even though a part of him wanted to keep doing that.

 

Loki's face slowly changed and he now looked wary.

 

“It’s not right and it’s not fair to you. I can’t have it both ways, I can’t have you and not have the consequences. It’s not how life works, or at least it’s not how it should. If I want you, I have to be able to live with that all the time and if I can’t, then I have to stop dragging you along.” He said earnestly and a little more wariness came onto Loki’s face.    
  
“So I made a choice,” Tony said.  

 

Loki looked scared for a moment before he quickly covered in that blank expression that Tony hated so much. Tony knew he was freaking Loki out, and so even though he had planned to do it a little later, he moved it up.

 

The brunette took the vial  in his hand and smashed it on the ground. Loki’s eyes widened at the unexpected movement. “Whatever this is, whatever we’re doing, I’m not going to forget it anymore.”

 

Loki looked between Tony and shattered pieces of the vial on the floor like he was expecting something else to happen, like he was expecting someone to jump out from behind something and say it that it was all some trick. When nothing did, after a while, he focused again on Tony.   
  
“Whatever this is, I won’t forget it, not again,” Tony repeated as he closed the distance between the two of them, putting his arms around Loki’s head. “So long as you won’t,” Tony said, feeling butterflies start to rise up in his stomach and twirl around like ballerinas.

 

Loki wasn’t great at showing emotions either. It was why he had spent months after showing he had emotions trying to convince Tony again that he didn’t. He knew that Loki didn’t like that Tony had forgotten Loki, but he wasn’t sure how Loki would respond to him saying that he wouldn't forget him again. Loki was unpredictable at the best of times.   
  
“Alright.” Was all Loki said.

 

The brunette had been hoping for something a little more profound, or at least longer than one word after he had said so much and it had been so hard, but he’d take it. Loki stared at him for a long moment; what he was looking for the genius wasn’t sure. If only he knew Loki as well as he knew his machines.   
  
“Are you going to tell anyone?”

 

This seemed like a trap of some sort, but since Tony had been making the decisions that had brought him to this point, he thought he’d let Loki deal with this one.   
  


“Depends, do you want to?” Tony asked even though he hoped that the answer was no. If anyone knew about their relationship as it stood at the moment, as weak and tentative as it was it, would likely topple.

 

Loki looked pensive for a few moments before he shook his head. “No.”

 

Tony nodded glad. Loki nodded, unexpectedly slipping out from under his arms. The hot raven hair being threw him with the strength of someone who was obviously not human into his bed. Thankfully the bed was soft or it might have hurt. Loki had a shark grin on his face that Tony both loved and loathed   
  
“Now that you are going to remember it in the morning, let me give you something to remember.” He said, climbing on top, presumably to do just that.

 

 

* * *

  
  
This was not the first time he woke to find Loki in his bed, but it was the first time in a while that Loki hadn't teleported out of there before he had woken up. Tony stared sleepily at Loki’s face as he slept. He was going to remember this time. When Loki left he was going to remember and he wasn’t going to forget again.   
  
The thought made the dancing butterflies start up again, this time it was unexpectedly joined with excitement. Tony found himself staring at Loki’s face, not noticing that Loki was awake until the being in his bed spoke with traces of annoyance and curiosity.    
  
“What are you staring at?”

 

 

Tony didn’t how to answer, so he just leaned over and started kissing him. It was very rare for them to do this. Normally, when Loki woke up he gave Tony the potion and left. Occasionally they would go at it again but not often.

 

Tony found himself just softly kissing him though, not the usual harsh, sometimes biting kisses that tended to come from their arrangement. Though he supposed that their original arrangement was now over since he was going to remember now.

  
Loki, after a few minutes of their languid pace, apparently got tired of it because he flipped the two of them over so that he was on top and upped the pace. Tony eagerly kissed back and moaned when Loki mouth started to leave his lips and go downwards.   
  
Yes, he shouldn’t be doing whatever he was with Loki. Yes, Loki was a criminal and he doubted any of his friends would understand or like his choice. Yes, it would probably cause problems in the future but he had made his choice and he was sticking with it.   


**Author's Note:**

> This isn't the end of the series, at least it's not if people want more... so let me know if you want more.


End file.
